Tuesday, September 1, 2009


Dear Andy,

Ok this is very bad cause when you're bored at home you are given time to ponder. and when you are not pondering about the wrong things.. it gets you depressed.Such examples are," Why am i such a failure?Since when did i tell myself that everything was okay? Since when did i lose my competitive spirit?Since when did you start distancing from me?Since when did i start having pimple breakouts so often!! Since when did fear become such an obstacle in my life?"

After asking myself all this since whens.. it just boils down to the fact that it's the holidays and instead of being able to see my friends more, i'm not. i thought i got used to poly. Because even if i didn't get to see my MG friends, i'll still get to see my clique in school. Now, i'm stuck at home.wondering all over again.Did i just spend my last semester doing badly? Did i just regret wasting my whole semester away forgetting how important my marks are? I did it again, didn't i? And what beats the crap out of me is, I know i could do well.If only.. i tried to.

Today. Today i'm going to pray for a new beginning. Tomorrow i'm going to wake up to a new me. The me that will start her diet plan.The me that will pick up a new language.The me that will clear up her room. Because when you fall and you injure yourself, you either bandage your wound and get up. Or cry and continue to bleed. And after being covered with cuts and wounds, you might just die.Die from losing too much blood.Or an infection. Until then, it'll be too late.It's my new way of thinking life. It's a battlefield.

tre arty
@ 8:09 PM|